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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28441023">A Sparrow's Flight</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertlebear/pseuds/bertlebear'>bertlebear</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Begging, Blood and Injury, Canon Universe, Cuddling &amp; Snuggling, Death, Dreams and Nightmares, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, Mild Sexual Content, Pegging, Regret, Self-Hatred, Sleep Deprivation, Training, Trust Issues, prompts</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 21:15:29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,721</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28441023</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bertlebear/pseuds/bertlebear</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Bertholdt doesn’t remember what it’s like to love. He can’t fathom to understand this strange complexity that has him feeling everything and nothing at the same time. The pleasant fluttering throb that causes his heart to soar or the bitter wrenching aches that tear it. Although he’s terrified above and beyond, he believes firmly that he can try. A chance for you, at least, he still wants to make his worth for what’s left of his balance, you deserve that much after all. With each agonizing end that fades, he wants you to promise his new hopeful beginning, day by day.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bertolt Hoover &amp; Reader, Bertolt Hoover/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>52</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Day 1: Renewal</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I realized that I had this prepared for almost two months now and since I don’t have enough time to whip up something big for Bert’s birthday, I’ll begin this ongoing drabble series! I plan for this to be an ongoing process that will last until his next birthday so a new drabble will be updated around once every week? At least that’s what I’m aiming for, so let’s do this. Hope you find this long ride as fun as I will!</p>
    </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt - Holding their hand when they are shaking.<br/>Warnings: Slight mention of spoilers.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I’m sorry.”</p><p>The final rays of sunlight kept flittering against your eyes, and you squinted them shut, deciding to pull tighter against the solid warm body in front of you. It was the least you could do, jaw unable to loosen and scraps of rationality diminished to dust.</p><p>You didn’t think it could hurt that much. Going on your first expedition outside the walls was supposed to be inevitably terrifying, but also awakening to witness — the glorious skies and that soaring tingle of freedom. Throughout several moments you believed the justice was worth the scarring, weapons clutched firmly in both hands and abundant blood rushing. Within minutes your members was snatched airless, each meeting a death that only showed cruelty.</p><p>So unfair, that they all died except for you. Sometimes while blinking you could see their mixtures of expressions, regret, anger, horror, and the sweat pouring over their faces, soon to join the crimson pools rippling and hungry for lost souls.</p><p>One in particular continuously caught against your chest, it was the peaceful smile that she had sent you, final and comforted when Bertholdt had arrived. He seemed numb to your broken screams, only empty sound illustrating the incomprehensible horrors you faced.</p><p>What met your eyes instead today were piles upon piles of destruction, bloodshed around, squeezing and caving until you were forced to narrowly flee. Like everyone else that kept their head down, you could say the sight was tragically beautiful, how wrong everything had gone.</p><p>He had hauled you off your knees, the ringing in your ears unbearable. The limp but nonetheless alive individual in his arms had miraculously been found and rescued, except this time in a faraway, opposite atmosphere than the cadet days you had light-heartedly shared. Bertholdt had taken you away so suddenly, urging his horse onwards to say nothing and everything at the same time. Perhaps you should’ve been happy that you could live to see another sunset. You <em>wished</em> you could say the equivalent for your spiking thoughts, dispersed and yet coming out in a hoarse cry brimming with hatred.</p><p>“Why me, Bertholdt?”</p><p>Nothing except galloping clicks of hooves filled your silence, and grabbing both his shoulders, you could feel the way his head dipped, features hidden as if ashamed he couldn’t ease your agony.</p><p>A hand reaches to slip itself over, warm and quelling the uncontrollable shakes of your hands. It felt surreal, watching your own terror lodge its way into witnessing evidence. You didn’t like that such a simple action could do so much, however, your heart aches to hold anything, chilling waves of desperation and misplace washing over you. Higher it went, until you were choking back sobs and pressing your cheek into his back.</p><p>Through hazy eyes you could see that birds were flocking in the distance, faint shouts of other soldiers echoing. But then again, maybe it was just figments of your imagination— grief was a complicated accomplice to carry after all. Several heartbeats passed before you spoke again.</p><p>“It was Annie all along...”</p><p>For a second you could’ve sworn you felt his hands tremble as well.  </p><p>Next time you knew you had to do better.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Day 2: Enamoured</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Tucking the sheets around them when they stir during the night.” <br/>Warnings: None.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He was irresistibly adorable— leisurely sprawled across the desk in the chair, slack position with his arms tucked to support his rested head. Like a hedgehog’s spines, Bertholdt’s nestle of bed hair always managed to crack tender smiles from you.</p>
<p>The house is strangely quiet, atmosphere empty save for the fan’s hum to your nearby left. It isn’t particularly abnormal, entering his room only to figure out he’s fast asleep. Sometimes he would nod off upon your presence, the fluttering of his lashes and that familiar clouded gaze your tell-tale sign to settle down and call it a night. Other times he would try to blatantly conceal, except the unspoken silence was his greatest flaw. You’d catch the hasty retreat of light eyes and raven hair dipping low over his features. Most of the time, it was also accompanied by his sharp exhale, or in rare occasions the slight hunching of posture.  </p>
<p>Whether he was noticed or not, wasn’t the big picture however. The wind-down that settled over when evening skies arrived couldn’t be deemed more as infallible. Each lingering embrace, soothed or disrupted, had never failed to sprout delicacy between your joint exhaustion.</p>
<p>Moving closer, you’re met in piles of paperwork.  There are scribbles, charts, even signatures of the like, all neatly done but near the end you know it’s been put aside. On the centre of the table lies his laptop, fingers not quite touching the keyboard but screen still emitting light. Numerous websites, probably left for work and…what’s this? Even a strategizing game of some sort to let loose, you struggled to hold back the small breathless giggle.</p>
<p>He only drifted off minutes ago and probably couldn’t hear you, but it came out soothing in whisper. “I brought you some tea.” </p>
<p>Soft snoring filled the gap of hush, shoulders shifting under the blanket Bertholdt had wrapped himself in. You close your eyes and huff out a sigh, observing the two identical warm beverages before settling yourself onto the bed. Tomorrow, you decided in light-heart wait to let him rest and move to switch off the lamp.</p>
<p>Surprising how he could stir awake to the change of light but not your pattering of footsteps. You freeze, gaze fixed when his head shifts from side to side, letting out a grunt. Hand already on the doorknob, your senses are far although focused enough to catch the tiny murmur.</p>
<p>“Cold…”</p>
<p>To the unbelievable throb of your pulse, he quivers but at last meets your eyes, brief and lax as if comforted by the sight of warmth. Shaking your head do you place the tea beside him, grabbing the blanket and pulling it up tighter around his shoulders.</p>
<p>Sneaky, now he reaches for the cup billowing with steam, pupils dilated when they finally seem to sink in that you’re real and here. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?”</p>
<p>“I think you’re talking to the wrong person.” You never failed to recognize the nasally croak of his sleepy voice.</p>
<p>Patting his head, you get up to cup Bertholdt’s trembling fingers and leave a kiss against the crown of his hair. But helplessly, the small chiding couldn’t be missed. “Don’t catch a cold overnight— work can always wait until later. I’ll be in the living room if you need me.”</p>
<p>He reluctantly nods, almost sheepish, and the simple action is enough for you to close the door, unsuccessful in supressing the endearing grin rising over your cheeks.</p>
<p>It’d be a while before you could gradually wipe that admiring image off your mind.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :) Writing this made me so soft inside.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Day 3: Pleasantries</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Traveling long distances just to see them.” <br/>Warnings: None.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He’s turning the doorknob, you hear the tiny chirp of a car and your fluttering heart begins to race. What’s more astonishing is the way you carry yourself over, feet scrambling and excitement barely containable to slip across the floor in your socks. The noise is muffled and light against the floorboards, but you don’t pay much mind, welcoming the break of silence with your anticipating breaths.</p>
<p>At this point you knew it was him, the jingle of keys and the gentle click of the door shutting. Turning around the corner, you eagerly barrel into his chest, squeezing tight while relishing the warmth that swamps over your senses. You realize you’re memorizing that pine scent once again. It had been so comforting, so familiar just like the last time he had visited. </p>
<p>Strong arms pull you tighter. Now upon getting over the initial shock, Bertholdt lets out a chuckle and returns your hug. The soothing hum of his voice fills your ears. “I missed you too.”</p>
<p>“Things have been crazy,” You murmur sheepishly while looking up into his eyes. They’re a pale green of shade scattered with darker flecks— your mind had always found them alluring, also highlighting the unique contrast of his dark raven hair.</p>
<p>He pauses, cheeks bright and ears flushed from the chilly weather. Still too tall, you pull on his arm and he gets the message, leaning down slightly. Another hand reaches to cup his cheek and the action elicits from him a small gasp at your heat. Intimacy had always been something the both of you strived not to cower from. Many months had passed since seeing him in person, and if this wasn’t surreal enough then you were sure to wake up soon from this keen dream.</p>
<p>Before anything happened next, you decided to seize the moment to kiss him. Peckish to test the waters, you already yearned for the curve of his mouth, and to feel those soft, supple lips pressing firmly against yours.  The smile that graces his features matches your blissful expression. His touch is exactly how you recalled it, refreshed and fluttering across your skin. </p>
<p>“Sweetheart?”</p>
<p>Bertholdt’s breathless whisper that follows after pulling away tugs against your chest. Wrong, it’s combined with the loose, almost curious force of his hand on your wrist as you turn back around.  Your heart skips a beat. Surely you misheard him— the blood rushing to your head must have been getting through to your system. </p>
<p>Silence.</p>
<p>His mellow gaze shifts, lull replaced by dawning confusion. “Is something wrong?”</p>
<p>“No, it’s just that,” You placed your head into your hands, feeling ridiculous. Not getting the message, he only peers pensively at you before going wide eyed at your small chuckle. “You’ve never used an endearing nickname on me before.”</p>
<p>“Ah, sorry if it was sudden…” A sound between a groan and laugh escapes him, the extent of what he said catching up. “I guess it just slipped out of my mouth.”</p>
<p> “Are you…not comfortable with that?” He notices your bashful look through the flits of your fingers, cheeks flushing along but in humiliation instead. “If you want I can stop-”</p>
<p>“No,” You squeeze his hand, deciding to prove your point by tippy-toeing up to kiss his nose. Although he flinches, there’s an obvious grin shying away underneath.  “I think we’re far in enough, Bert.”</p>
<p>“Okay.” The smallest of nods reaches your eyes and you both share plenty of giggles before you take him by the sleeve.</p>
<p>“Hopefully the flight wasn’t too long.” Bertholdt grunts in protest as you insistently nudge him further inside the house, grazing over the surroundings. You could sense the nostalgia washing over him. You could feel his unspoken contentment that lingered. Your night was taking a turn for the best.</p>
<p>“It was worth the wait.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :) Long distance relationships are unlike anything else so I wanted to incorporate it!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Day 4: Warmth</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Making their favourite meal when they are having a hard day.” <br/>Warnings: None.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Drip, the sound flicks against your ears again. It’s annoying, persistent, and you can’t help but shut the door slightly harder than normal, earning an inquisitive noise from him. Growing louder and louder inside your head, you were afraid the disturbance would peak and spill out the lodged frustrations. A part of you paused while stealing a glimpse of his shadow around the corner. You wanted to be honest and knew he would listen. But another voice was harsher, and grumbled to brush it off and to not burden him with your problems. Bertholdt had enough on his hands as he did, and fuelling the fire on both sides could only bring unwanted tension.  </p>
<p>You didn’t have a choice to avoid him anyways, swift to notice his approaching footsteps from the corner of your eye. Although you raised your head to greet him, there was no room for hiding the irritable twitch of your brows behind that sickening, sweet smile. Eyes wide, he visibly blanched at the disheveled sight, perhaps it really had been worse than you’d realized. Smoothing out your sweater and making your way towards the kitchen, he stared after you, still refusing to begin any small talk.</p>
<p>Drip.</p>
<p>Grounding your teeth, the splash of water met your ears again, and it was funny, how much of a nuisance it caused towards your train of thought despite being tiny, almost futile.</p>
<p>You barely register the action but your hands are removing your jacket, and words begin to spill forth once the refrigerator door conceals the exhausted grimace on your face. Spoken too fast, your sentences are more brusque and impatient than you’d like. “Where’s the ice-cream that I bought last night?”</p>
<p>His face peeks over the door, watching intently while your hands rummage through only to open the freezer above. The silence continues—you’re not sure who was talking to whom anymore. Once again, it was up to good-old bravery to conquer the situation.</p>
<p>Letting out a sigh you closed the appliance, frowning and head hung low. Your heart pounded, not quite noticeable compared to acknowledging Bertholdt’s trap that lay right in front of your eyes.  </p>
<p>“Did you have a bad day at work?”</p>
<p>You continued to stalk forward, adamant to brush past him. “It’s nothing.”</p>
<p>“I don’t think so.” He holds his arms out, and you save the embarrassment of crashing into him by halting. An inward groan, you found it ridiculous that he got the message and yet wouldn’t pass the discomfort up. At times, you hated how he knew you better than yourself.</p>
<p>“Like I said-”</p>
<p>“Stop that.” The soft patter of tentative footsteps met your ears. “I know you want ice cream, but dinner first.”</p>
<p>Being gentle had managed to patch through in most problems, however your mind was spinning and thoughts melting into a mush of bleak disappointment. As if black sludge swam over your composure, you realized it couldn’t hurt to tell. All of a sudden nothing mattered anymore. He was here, and you allowed his arms to envelop you, to feel the swift but loving kiss on your forehead that held strong to reassure.</p>
<p>“I’m sorry...” Your throat was aching, voice raw though the expected tears did not form.  </p>
<p>“Shhh,” he murmured. The relaxing sound had always fitted him. “Do you mind telling me what happened?”</p>
<p>“Zeke fired me.” To your surprise you speak; maybe the crushing twinge of helplessness that repeatedly beat against your chest was merely a void-less illusion. “Said he didn’t need me working for him anymore. I have to pack my things soon. Friday is my last day.”</p>
<p>Thankfully you were already anticipated his crestfallen look, blinking for several moments and eyebrows tightening in what seemed to be confusion, then denial. “Really?”</p>
<p>You finally released the pent-up sigh and shake your head. “Unfortunately, yeah. I’m not sure where to even begin...”   </p>
<p>“You couldn’t have known. I’m sure he had his reasons, and it wasn’t your fault at all.” Sure, his comfort appeared honest and genuine, but upon that you didn’t have any say of your own after that. If something stuck, it was certainly the idea of collapsing onto the couch and to collect your forgotten energy for tomorrow.     </p>
<p>His gaze trails to the living room, eyes telling a story of their own and tugging your feet out of the kitchen. “Thankfully I have just the solution.”</p>
<p>Not until your awareness catches up do you feel warmth blossoming up your chest at seeing your favourite meal, sitting on the dinner table. Returning your brightened grin, the rest of your night had been brilliantly made. Bertholdt tried his best, and it was a good enough start for you.   </p>
<p>“I made your favourite. Let’s eat first before continuing, how does that sound?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :) Get yourself someone as sweet as Bert.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Day 5: Unconditional</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Giving them a kiss before going to work and they are still in bed.”<br/>Warnings: None.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You weren’t sure what fazed you more—the tiny snores that grumbled right in your ear and shuddered down your spine or the immense warmth and his heartbeat that enveloped you gently. Heat tickled under your skin and slowly your vision cleared to see sunlight filtering between the curtains, mellow and buoyant. It was morning already.  </p>
<p>“Hmm...” Getting out of bed usually proved to be a hassle for you, his fidgeting and broad shoulders pressed against yours joined by the unwavering hands cradled around your waist, careful yet secure. At times you both grew careless. Delirious from exhaustion and collapsing until morning dawned, there was no surprise this always resulted in abstract patterns and situations that stunned you to no end.</p>
<p>Being on top had its benefits; you were always comforted by his rhythmic breathes, a lone boat rising and falling along the soothing ocean waves. He’d hold you for what seemed to be decades without doubt, as long as you’d want, however when the lights turned low and nights grew restless was when your downfall struck.</p>
<p>This was supposed to help, nestled above him and admiring his iridescent eyes up close. Your main point hadn’t been listed, and again the fear sunk deep inside your stomach when the sheets shift and he rolls onto his side. Sharp, aching sensations travel up your arm, and you realize his hipbone had crushed your wrist under the weight. Moving off him takes energy, and you constantly tell yourself that he’s unconscious of his actions but it tears at your heart hearing him apologize so profusely after. He’s not quite pitiful, rather you insist that every aspect of him is loveable, even the more difficult ones.</p>
<p>You shake your head and bite back a grimace to inspect the hand. Red, but not swollen or injured, thankfully. He may be built like a tower and exceptionally gentle, though your lips tugged into a smile at the idea if your roles were reversed, suffocating and unbelievably ridiculous. Spooning or having him rest over your abdomen caused no harm however; to be frank you craved running your hands through his soft raven hair every now and then so it had grown into a valuable option.  </p>
<p>At last you free yourself up, sitting positions were the finish to your problems. Bertholdt hadn’t stirred much from your movements, in fact several incoherent murmurs could be heard so that in itself was a separate achievement. Glancing at the clock you can’t help scowling. Waking up early was another cost, although you might as well make breakfast. The thought of savoury food quickly put your bitter crabbiness to brighter spirits, and the pajama buttons are replaced by another t-shirt, you wondered how they ended up loose anyways.  </p>
<p>Fingers deftly brush against your forearm, your stride off the bed halted. Bertholdt is stubborn and miraculously timed—catching you mid-action through changing. His head is a fluffy mess, eyes droopy and grip faltering. The dry crack of voice takes you off guard, and he smiles with a gaze that reflects yours, incredibly tender and sends your heart swelling up. </p>
<p>“Ten more minutes?”  </p>
<p>You roll your eyes and grin, leaning into his touch when fingers move once more to cup your cheek. He wanted you to take his hint, refusing was futile at this point. Tentatively you slipped around to sit beside him, staying for a couple more minutes like this didn’t sound terrible at all. Buried between affection and hunger, the love you held over him would never change.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :) This was adorable to write so I hope you enjoy!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Day 6: Intoxicated</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Tucking your head into their neck during a hug.” <br/>Pairing: Bertholdt X Reader<br/>Warnings:Slight mentions of alcohol?</p>
<p>Writing Bert drunk puts me in such a funky, incoherent mood and I love it. Also props to my lovely friend @colossalnova on Tumblr and her <a href="https://colossalnova.tumblr.com/post/641180265398632448/how-they-are-when-drunk-pt-1-%F0%90%90%AA%F0%90%91%82-%F0%90%90%AA%F0%90%91%82-%E2%82%92-%F0%90%90%AA%F0%90%91%82">drunk AOT headcanons,</a> I can’t get the inspiration out of my head and HAD to write this!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There was a promise, as simple as what lay in front of your eyes. You made countless mental notes, gaze drifting left and right at how things spiralled out of control. At some point the situation went wrong, and you’d like to think if the beginning of drinks hadn’t been allowed then this fuzzy mood—although tooth-rottenly endearing—would be impossible to discover.    </p>
<p>Bertholdt and alcohol did not mesh well together.</p>
<p> Wriggling out of his grasp, you shot him a glare. Those deft fingers fell short at grabbing your waist and were placed limply back to his lap, long ago you had lost track of the several kisses he placed against your face, neck, wherever he could snag one. It never did occur to you how ravelled he could become, awfully helpless whenever he was missing the precious person by his side.</p>
<p>“Ugh, stop that.” Light sensations thrummed the exposed skin and your nerves registered hot hands flittering up your sides.</p>
<p>“I can’t help it, you’re so soft and fun to rile up...”</p>
<p>“You want to see riled?”</p>
<p>Eyes wide and bottom lip jutted out, he scowled, a lost puppy that had trailed after you constantly since the party started. You try to ignore his expression, foot tapping furiously in thought on how to shake him off. Perhaps the liquid made him fidgety and he just needed somebody by his side, physically at most. Or worst case scenario you were stuck with his happy-go lucky spell until dawn and had to deal with the aftermath of his hangover. Either path sent your head reeling. Your heart truly called to him, but not like this; everything at once was overwhelmingly draining and difficult to keep up. </p>
<p>This was perfectly fine, your unspoken fears shone instead on the likelihood that Bertholdt could only escalate from here.  </p>
<p>When you return shortly to the living room with a glass of water does your blood run cold. Right there in front stood an empty chair, and he had run off to who knows where again. Numerous voices echoed off to the backyard, in particular blond hair slicked back catches your sight. Porco would know.</p>
<p>“I remembered that dare you made him do.” He wheezes from your harsh elbow, no damage however bothering it was.  As hilariously stupid as it looked, you don’t have the energy to face-palm.  </p>
<p>Bertholdt swayed back and forth, astoundingly gigantic on top of the table and careless in his own world while waving his limbs. Reiner’s up there too, both have locked arms and clap while you hear their remnants of a speech, the words ‘hedgehogs’ and ‘Pieck’ in tow. His yelp is drowned out by everyone’s cheers, gaze singling you into view from the rest. You didn’t think he’d take Porco’s  deal, and his face seems to redden just the slightest more when he clambers unsteadily down to safe ground, the alcohol must have reached its peak now. </p>
<p>Along the way suddenly his lanky limbs aren’t so independent now and they drop onto your shoulders, combined with the latter of his body. You figured, judging by his flooding odour of sweat and alcohol, faint although nonetheless present. His chin brushes over your head and you can’t take him anymore, chuckles falling from your lips while he stumbles ungracefully onto the couch. The bright smile he gives you is daring, and silence along with water is his only reward, your hammering pulse seizes this moment to de-stress and reflect.</p>
<p>“You’re finally done?”</p>
<p>“I should get something for you to drink too, it’s actually really fun-” You grab him by both forearms before he frowns, almost innocently and plops back down.  </p>
<p>“I’ve had enough.” Your voice is low but insistent and gives no room for negotiation.</p>
<p>The high is coming to a dead end and Bertholdt is fixed into place. He’d much rather stick close to you and that’s exactly how the advantage turns. His head wilts into your chest and the extra nuzzling comes to marks its revenge.    </p>
<p>Slowly but surely his eyes begin to lose its flaring shine, little by little he buries himself deeper against your chest. You’re losing grasp on reality too, this isn’t exactly babysitting but rules can bend for this exception. Circular motions trace your neck, his touch soft and quelling away the dull aches ringing throughout your nerves. Yes, focusing on that pleased your senses and delightful chills wrack your body while he tucks himself underneath.</p>
<p>“Boobies.” He giggles from between your shirt and that was the breaking point. Warmth blossomed in your chest, enough to chase away each fading troubles he’d cause, the priceless consequence returning solid. You don’t resist the urge to respond, patting his head gently as he settles, sighing into your calm ministrations.</p>
<p>“I love you too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Hope you enjoyed :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Day 7: Strength</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Lightly kissing on top of a freshly formed bruise.” <br/>Pairing: Bertholdt X Reader<br/>Warnings: Slight mentions of blood.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>His eyes are lurking, demanding something out of you when arriving home.</p>
<p>Sharp prickles of agony shoot up your legs and he can’t help but catch the crumpling form in his arms, see those broken, glassy eyes blink back hard tears. Bertholdt notices your weight tremble, smeared dirt and debris beside bright crimson. They were carelessly thrown, and his gaze trains to the wall, focused on that bleak white paint as if it will miraculously bring him away from this nightmare. It doesn’t—and he hates otherwise—but after several heartbeats pass he gathers enough sanity to close the door and scoop you against him for balance.</p>
<p> He feels a tightening around his sides, your feeble clutch illustrating frustration, disturbance, and everything in between. By the way his eyes widened and visible swallows becoming heavy, you didn’t want to speak. This scared him beyond what you’ve ever seen before, but that option appealed over anything diffusing the consequences, be if you confessed or rather open your mouth at all.</p>
<p>The unbearable silence continues, and you wonder if the pain was worth more than his shattering composure, more than your pressured, uncertain bond of trust. Nothing moves or speaks, numbness is settling in and you can only feel definite patches when he ghosts his hands over your skin. At some point he must’ve taken your ragged clothes away, because the frigid air begins to seep in and chill your bones.</p>
<p>Despite the clashing heat, his touch isn’t enough to comfort you, and neither is his tense movements, growing palpable and unsteady. You’re not sure why—or for what reason this happened—you guess this could be blamed on choices and just being present at the wrong timing. Even such simple explanations only cut deeper and boosted the coincidence question at large. Your hazy gaze trails back to him upon his return.</p>
<p>Intimacy is something else when you’re put to your knees, hatefully vulnerable in from of him. Now that he’s taken out the gauzes and bandage rolls, there’s no escaping it and you’re left exposed and suffocating. The pieces of your heart are crushed further upon his darkened pupils, emitting another side, a hidden grappling emotion.</p>
<p>You didn’t dare look Bertholdt in the eyes, afraid to be sucked away by his swirling aura, and so your gaze wanders, staring anywhere other than him. Chances of speaking were shot down as your throat seized up at the simple thought of what to rasp out.  </p>
<p>Ongoing this process went, and sooner or later exhaustion faded into a sort of despair. Your initial high was replaced, instead what met you stood his hands, shifting your face and gingerly dabbing gauze. The excruciating stings flare up but you steer agony right back, and with gritted teeth it failed at bringing your expression to flinch.</p>
<p>You wished enough energy could be spent to ask him—caring for someone unconditionally like this without owing any words. Regardless, that opportunity had passed long ago and once again you hung your head low, not quite shameful but rather increasingly upset.</p>
<p>Soft tingling brings you back, and you’re not sure if it’s an illusion. Bertholdt’s lips flutter against your skin, brewing some sort of wavering ache you couldn’t decipher. He doesn’t smile or frown, retaking a straight face yet in his own way your conscious recognized it as assurance.</p>
<p>His head dips from planting kisses along your shoulder south towards your wrist. Particularly he hovers over one of the bruises, an outlandish violet dotted with rotten brown, and hot exhales fall against your bare skin.  It appeared to hold overwhelming power, because you couldn’t take your gaze off of him, ethereal couldn’t begin to describe the shivers running down your spine as you sat bewildered.   </p>
<p>You had no choice but to stare when he positioned himself in front, examining and calculated while tilting your chin up.  His hand reaches to delicately thumb away the stray streak of blood by your mouth, and finally after several brief pauses he looks you properly dead in the eyes.</p>
<p>His voice is quiet, but you’re quick to note the threat beneath, anger <em>barely</em> restrained in a murderous whisper.</p>
<p>“Who did this to you?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated! Oooh boy you’ve got him hooked around your finger. Hope you enjoyed :)</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Day 8: Conjoin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Prompt: “Buying them something unrequested because it made you think of them.” <br/>Pairing: Bertholdt X Reader<br/>Warnings: NSFW: Pegging, hand job, begging.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>If you could describe this one scene laid out below your eyes, it would certainly be a beauty, and the kind that left you touched and speechless.</p>
<p>Bertholdt’s gaze was blown wide, focusing on your hands that flexed before meeting his whimper with another kiss against his swollen lips. What previously led to this your foggy mind couldn’t recall, too occupied and lost in the instant. One thing led to another, and you guessed the idea of pegging him arose. Sure Bertholdt had openly expressed he was okay with it, but not until you brought the strap on out that his face flushed an unhealthy amount of red.</p>
<p>“I got this for you. Consider it a surprise.” You weren’t lying at least, but couldn’t help feeling that nasty pull at the pits of your stomach when he propped himself up and gestured for you to come up, amusement written all over. The severity of the situation hit at once and you realized just how surreal it was becoming.   </p>
<p>You realized the present was sinking in, that this was all behind and currently proceeding upon your ears, kissed by his guttural groans.</p>
<p>“You like it that much, hm?” Now that you took one good look at him, eyes drinking in his broken, restless form—you were able to feel a smile tugging.</p>
<p>The cause of his expression and pleasure boosted wonders to your soft fingers, scissoring with great care inside of him. Even when your hand is soaked in lube and extra gentle to push, it still surprises you how loose and easy his body adapts, almost made for the connecting moment.</p>
<p>The white sheets dampen with every twist of his back. He’s uncontrollably sensitive under you, and heat mingles between both of your skin, despite being covered with goose bumps. Your other hand is laced tightly against his, trying to provide comfort and Bertholdt shudders on the edge of sanity.</p>
<p>“Just a little more, I’m right here.” You breathe the murmur into his ear and start to trail tiny kisses up the side of his neck, marking exactly the way he likes it. When you find that sweet spot does he arch up and let out a low groan, burying his head against your shoulder.</p>
<p>“I can’t- please- I can’t-”</p>
<p>He must have loved the interruption because your heart soars in ecstasy at his lidded eyes, so clouded in desire. You lean back to observe him for several seconds, marvelling his blue sweater that had been hiked up by your hands, craved to run along the planes of his chest, down to the expanses of his slender thighs. Bertholdt’s black hair is matted in sweat, and his eyes burn with vigorous desperation, something wavering behind that seems to be beginning tears. And finally your gaze catches on his hard length, the head a pretty shade of pink and practically begging to be touched shameless.</p>
<p>He’s so beautiful, so good for you and <em>only</em> you.</p>
<p>Nodding quickly, Bertholdt is eager once he notices the disappearance of your hand, filling him so well. Perhaps he’s even beyond your own excitement, judging by his fingers that creep up to squeeze the curve of your sides and another reaching to trace a thumb along your shaky jaw. There wasn’t any reason to blame him, seeing the agitated position he found himself drifting in for the past few minutes.</p>
<p>You don’t miss how his cheeks are hot to the touch, nor do you miss how his legs tremble when you press up closer against him. This time the strap on is in place of your hand, the tip brushing and he audibly gasps, head tilting back into the headboard and mouth parted, so irresistibly pretty that your mouth meets his again.  </p>
<p>Bertholdt chases after your lips but pauses as you speak. “You’re going to be amazing, okay? Just relax and I’ll make it easy for you.”</p>
<p>He rasps out a quiet ‘yes’ and that’s honestly all that you needed, both of you had been building up the release for way too long.</p>
<p>The abrupt coldness you’ll admit he wasn’t prepared for, however the deeper you push, slowly inch by inch, you sense the unfamiliar twist in his gaze melt. The burning stretch fades until his weak murmurs of ‘please’ and ‘more’ becomes increasingly prominent. You roll your hips, being experimental, and didn’t expect to send him into another universe, seeing stars when an added hand slides down to rub teasingly at his weeping cock, smearing some pre-cum over his stomach.</p>
<p>“Oh gosh, I-”</p>
<p>You had to admit the combined sensation also made you see him in a new light, completely lost in your pace, steady thrusts while the room was filled with constant squelches and heavy panting. He can’t keep up and begins to lose trace, hands gripping your shoulders and moving south to hide his head. Furiously your heart pounded, overwhelmed in blinding euphoria. He felt so hot, tightening around where you had merged and legs fluttering at each tiny shift.</p>
<p>Sweat glistens on his skin and your whisper tumbles out, an involuntary command. “Look how good you take it. I want to see, want to watch you come.”</p>
<p>There’s no coherent reply, instead you watch him silently reveal his face, peering sheepishly and adorned by several beads of sweat. His lips tremble, and you kiss away the angry furrows on his brows, lingering on the deeper ones when they refuse to dwindle. Bertholdt groans— and the growing heat threatens to spill, coil compressing and full of packed tension.</p>
<p>Your pace stutters, and you gulp back numerous breaths, hand slipping over his cock, stunned breathless and mesmerized at the sight. He cries out, but it’s softer than normal, mixed in between several gasps, and you watch him convulse, feel the warmth of his sticky essence burn onto the skin of your stomach and hips. Bertholdt was bound to spiral undone, and you carve the sight into memory, grinning and waiting several seconds while he catches his breath, flinching when your hands enclose again around his length, the next step of the night soon to initiate.</p>
<p>“You were great.” Needless to say it was worthwhile to do again, and Bertholdt mirrors the fervour, sighing into your kiss and breathes hitching when your thumb flicks over his head, wet and renewed in pre-cum.</p>
<p>He looks up into your devilish smirk and it occurs to him that he can’t feel anything else as incredible as this, he can’t get enough, and you feel his hands grip your body ever the slightly tighter.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Based off these prompts: <a href="https://50-item-writing-prompts.tumblr.com/post/180600714495/50-wordless-ways-to-say-i-love-you">50 Wordless Ways to Say "I love you."</a> by @50-item-writing-prompts on Tumblr!<br/>Thoughts/Comments are appreciated per usual, I’ve wanted to write this stirring idea FOREVER. Hope you enjoy the meal &lt;3</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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